This, That, the UnUsual

I have been in a little funk lately – a bit discouraged because I  want to be someone else, want different skills and talents, want a different life.  A major part of my sobriety, where I put a lot of my effort, is in working at self-acceptance, because for most of my life I have been at constant war and enmity with what and who I am.

So today I offer a small prayer of thanksgiving for the good that I am and hope that this is pleasing to God who, after all, made me to be what I am  and to do what I can do, rather than to be someone else doing what I cannot!  For this idea, and for the other little things below, I am most grateful!

1. Seemingly imperceptible, but real, improvements in my sobriety, my well-being, my peace of mind, my social relationships, my LIFE!

2. Knowing that God is with me and wanting the best for me

3. I accept better every day those things that I cannot change

4. Eccentric Albert Ellis and his amazing psychological insights  http://www.rebtnetwork.org/

5. Breakfast of yogurt with bananas and a few cups of coffee

For all this, and for so much other stuff, I turn my attention to gratitude!

Happy 24 hours to all!

Man Alive

More of the little

Last Friday I read of the recent death of a high school class mate.  He was 39 and cancer killed him.  I responded with a bit of sadness and though we were never close friends at least we were always cordial when we saw one another, and I found him to be very funny man with a strong sense of integrity and goodness.  RIP.

And I am left with today, the next 24 hours or so, and who knows what is going to happen?  Will I let the fear of death depress me and cower me?  Will I complain and say “Woe is me that I am going to the grave at some point?”  I don’t know , but I will try to live with some measure of gratitude that I have had a little time to enjoy the summer heat, to eat a bowl of spaghetti, to give little kisses to my girlfriend, to sleep an hour later today, to wake with energy and force and strength and power and intelligence!  

And that is today, there is nothing else.

Happy 24 hours to all of you struggling yet staying sober!

Man (Still!) Alive

Sore knees >*>*

Nearly everyday for the past few weeks work has kept me on my feet.  Walking, talking, organizing, running from here to there, etc.  Not surprisingly my knees are feeling sore, and I have been going to bed good and tired.  Sore knees and achy feet are a bit of a hassle, but I do find myself grateful that I am working a lot and working well.

So for this spurt of work and knowing that I have the skills (and knees) to meet the challenges, I give thanks, as I do for this other stuff of the day:

1. I had a great pasta at lunch

2. Mom sent me a massive number of pictures of my brother’s wedding, which I was unable to attend

3. I bought a new pair of rubbery shoes a few weeks ago and they are amazingly comfortable

4. The summer heat is as brutal as ever but it is not getting me down like in the past.  I suppose I just accept it better.

5. Everyday brings new challenges to sobriety and I am meeting these challenges and growing into them well.

So for all this and so much else I offer a prayer of thanksgiving.

Happy 24 hours to all the drunks on the net!

Man Alive