What is in my control today?

I find it extraordinarily difficult to be serene when I think that serenity it is beyond my control.  This is the first barrier to break, that of being convinced that my serenity is at the mercy of the people, places, and things around me.  Theoretically, anyone can be serene under any circumstances with the right thoughts.  Somehow, however, I have learned to be helpless.  Seligman’s book about this phenomenon is very helpful, but again that’s all in a book,  it’s all theory.  Practice is the tough part; living is the difficulty.  I find that I have to fight against this sometimes quite deliberately and fiercely to at least get this first fact straight, that my serenity is in my control, and I am responsible for it, that how I respond to all of life is up to me.  I count today as a victory, simply because I am fighting as best I can to put myself in a mental position to be happy, and that is what my sobriety is about today.